Sexual fantasies

Sexual fantasies

Threesomes, whips, handcuffs or bizarre costumes? Orgies in public places with unknown people? Sexual espionage committed against neighbors and “common sense”? No, it's not about productions forbiden to the minors, unconventional habits or manifestations against organised patterns, but about what most mortals on Earth secretly think about.

If at the behavioral level, sexual freedom is specific only to those who forget to take their medicine on time, to those who have very little left to live and want to enjoy it to the fullest, or to the ones who simply detest restrictions, at the level of imagination, it infiltrates subtly into everyone's mind, except, perhaps, the ascetics, insomniacs or corporatists addicted to work, salary bonuses, and hierarchically superior praise.

Imagination allows everything... from killing the boss when he is sleeping, extending the weekend with two, three days, until walking naked in the street or having a floor full of sexual subjects who could not say “no”. And its favorite place to play is the subconscious realm of dreams, where the rigors and comforts taken through education and habit become victims of a winning latent instinctuality.

As for the dream, this fascinating “function” of the human brain that scientists continue to try to understand in its entirety, it is known to bring a lot of default benefits: it helps to solving problems, it stimulates creativity, releases the stress, supplies certain deficiencies in the real plan, heals emotional wounds or facilitates even the going back in time and the revenge on the exuberant colleague in the kindergarten, always ready to make cruel farces and ruin innocent lives.

The dream also destroys the sexual inhibitions during the so-called erotic fantasies or “stories” developed during sleep according to the logic of satisfying some (most of them repressed) inner desires, going beyond the concepts of “acceptable” and “a man serious does not do it” who dictates the law in a normal and large-scale manner, in everyday life.

For example, if, in reality, the girlfriend vehemently refuses the presence of a third person in bed (or at least on its edge), in a dream she proves to be more than generous, bringing with her in bed the whole group of bisexual friends to have fun with her partner, endowed with many condoms, energisers and needs. If, in reality, the boyfriend wrinkles his nose at the idea of a vibrator to complete the private landscape, in a dream he “buys” the whole sex shop, including the seller, and even some perfumes with pheromones.

Obviously, imagination does not include only the “sexual excesses”, impossible (or difficult) pleasures to acquire in the real life (because of their own reserves or unfavourable circumstances), but also common scenes of sex, without fireworks, strippers with three breasts or physically and intellectually gifted men. Because, yes, in a dream it is not necessarily that the authors of the ecstatic experiences to be some geniuses in full bloom, quoting Schopenauer, while explaining how the galaxies spin at speeds incompatible with their apparent mass, and then proceeding to an aria of Rigoletto, simply for... “artistic purposes”.

The positive side of “perversities” during sleep, is that they do not correspond to a certain recipe, do not depend on the common boundaries of love behaviors classified as desirable, but they have their own rules and operating mechanisms that respond to the impulses of sexual exploring. Everyone experiences this kind of impulses, but only a few admit them, even when they go beyond the typical area of manifestation.

Many find it easier to ignore their own “slippages” than to shout them out. The fear of not involuntarily getting out from the raws of the classic normality is sometimes decisive, although, in general, one's fantasies do not affect “normality” at all, as long as they do not incite to aggressivity or self-aggressivity and do not break the law, respectively the consent of those involved.

According to studies, among the most widespread night “reveries” are the following:

1.-The fantasy of the perfect lover. This fantasy has variations from the cliché of the romantic dinner followed by an exciting episode of hot sex in front of the fireplace (made with the stable and official partner), up to the actions that the person does not usually practice, such as sex with an escort, with someone married or with the favorite star, sex on the kitchen table, in the elevator or in the office, sex in public places , under water or in positions that defy gravity. The common element of this kind of “revery” is not necessarily the novelty, but the idealization of the interaction and of the partner in the dream, whoever he might be. 

2.-The threesome. Regarding men, it is no longer surprising that they are constantly feeding their fantasies with pornographic scenarios where they are pampered by a pair of Asian twin or a feminine volleyball team that lacks inhibitions and sports equipment. The conclusions of a study conducted by the University of Montreal, show that men's secret desires are not limited to ordinary girls and women, sporty girls, nuns, actresses, escorts or strippers, but sometimes they include men as well. Men whom they watch satisfying their own partner. What's more, both sexes betray the weakness of ”love” in three, because some of the women imagine themselves in bed next to their “official” partner and his best friend or, in the “bi” version, next to a young woman who wants to discover new and exciting sensations.

3.-Homosexual relations. Whether they arise from curiosity and the desire for experimentation, or that they express a strong questioning of one’s own sexual orientation, or respecting the hypothesis of specialists who claim that all people are fundamentally bisexual, fantasies with people of the same gender are to be found both in women and men (which should not “scare” anyone, while the imagination sometimes has the “obligation” to explore all the alternatives offered by reality). The forms taken by this category of subconscious aspirations, vary in intensity and expressiveness, being able to illustrate almost everything: simple touches and caresses of shy tennagers or on the contrary, true orgasmic explosions with a “wild” tint.

4.-Fetishist fantasies. The studies partially confirm the stereotype that associates women with the submissive role assumed in the amorous context, many of Eve’s descendants preferring to be dominated oneirically, but not also in the real plan. It seems that they are dreaming of being kidnapped, raped, involved in an incestuous relationship, oppressed or controlled by the other against their will. One of the explanations for this theoretical miracle of victimization may lie in the pronounced narcissistic tendency of the dreamer, and who considers, in fact, that no one would be able to resist her massively underestimated diva charm. Other fetishes very common at the subconscious level, are those related to voyeurism and exhibitionism, which meet, sometimes, the typical pattern (the exhibitionist woman, the voyeurist man), and at other times they are unpredictable and progressive, surprising the role of some males who offer nudity on a silver plate and women who look at them as if they surpassed in beauty the statue of David by Michelangelo. Not even the “obsessios” from the sphere of “traditional” fetishes (punishments, role play, eccentric costumes, objects, aromas or special presences and much leather) are not overlooked by the playful desires of nonconformist dreamers. In a dream, everything is possible!

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Although not everyone who is sleeping or dreaming with open eyes will be taken to exotic lands where sex is free, where all women are Brazilian (or, at the very least, they look like them), and men are young, beautiful and muscular, chances for that to happen beyond closed eyes, are, of course, fairly large, especially because most people do not experience these erotic “adventures” as optional food, but as a main nocturnal “food”. And men do it more often than women, according to studies. And they are the ones who, to a greater extent, want to turn those mental experiences into reality. Or maybe also the young women want it, only that they do not say it aloud (always the gentlemen were allowed to behave a little more freely). 

Whatever the situation, for both, the recommendations are the same: if they have where, how and with whom to put their “utopias” into practice, without fear that the event will finally lead to prison, hospitalization, restraining order, mandatory therapy meetings or removal from the family will, then... they should do it! Otherwise, it would be good to examine their own sexuality a bit more in depth.